sorry no pics; just my thoughts! WOW! It is hard to believe that a month ago today we were in a court room in Siberia adopting our little girl! Steven and I both feel like it was a life time ago! We have come so far (physically and emotionally) in just 4 weeks. To us it feels like Ladi has always been right here with our family. Friends of ours that have adopted before us have told us throughout the year that we will forget all the anxiety and worrying that we were going through at that time. I kept saying, "No way I will ever forget this!"; but they were right! As I was reflecting on our journey of the past year; all the paperwork, worrying, anxiety, preparation and more worrying, running around Raleigh to get papers notarized and appostilled and doctors appointments and yes more anxiety- it all seems like a dream. I really don't remember it like that. Just a month ago we were standing in a room with a Russian judge; and we were explaining why we would be the "right" parents and family for Ladi. Steven and I were very nervous; never having done this before and not wanting to mess up! But I remember having peace about the entire trip! Even when things didn't go the way we wanted or planned. (Ok maybe not at peace when we were driving to the Russian airport to go home! You will have to ask Steven about that!) And even now with the unknowns about Ladi's past and future; I am just going to have to have faith. I am going to have to give up control- not give up- but not worry about the things I can not control! Like this week- Ladi started her immunizations - and we have to start over because we don't know what she had when she was an infant. You read all the books, blogs, listen to doctors and you have to make a decision on what you feel is best for your child. And of course this is just one example of many decisions that we will have to make over the course of her childhood. But she did great- no reactions! And yes we must do the same with our other children as well- but at least I do have some history and to me that gives me the illusion of being in control- but I am really not! So we pray and let go- give it to God! And we focus on all the good and blessings we see and feel. Like Ladi laughing and playing with her brothers. Her firsts - like going to a swim meet this week and cheering for her big brothers in the races! "Go Bryson, Go"- she was yelling just like me- it was so cute! And today we went to see her first movie in the theater. Even though she couldn't understand what was being said she still laughed with the other children. With all of her "firsts" she teaches me so much- I am humbled by her spirit and her trusting attitude and her quest to learn and her happiness- no worries- just trust- He has carried us all along! Some dear girl friends gave me a sign for my birthday that reads "Enjoy the Journey". I have hung it over the door leading out of my house to remind me- enjoy all of it! Laugh with the other children! And just trust in Him!
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13